Si tu voyais s'que chuis dev'nu

Si tu voyais s'que chuis dev'nu tu l'croirais pas.
J'vie dans une poubelle avec un chat.
J'ai pas d'ami,
Juste plein d'soucis.

Si tu voyais s'que chuis dev'nu tu l'croirais pas.
J'ai pas d'allure chus rien qu'un gros tas.
J'ai une paire de bas, un chandail pis un restant de pantalon.
J'ai pus envie mais j'reste icitte, chus qu'un gros con.

Si tu voyais s'que chuis dev'nu tu l'croirais pas.
J'ai mal en'dan pis j'ai pus de sang en bas.
J'fais du cul avec ma main,
Même si dans l'fond j'en veux pas vraiment.

Si tu voyais s'que chuis dev'nu tu l'croirais pas.
Pis si t'étais la j'y serais pas.
J'me suis bâtît une prison en poils de cul,
Pis dans pas long que j'vais finir tout'nue.

Si tu voyais s'que chuis dev'nu tu l'croirais pas.

Si j'partais aujourd'hui tu l'saurais pas.

well, someone had to do it!

[Movie] Trolljegeren

Their attempt at making it look like real found footage (À la Blair Witch) is a complete failure but it remains a very good trolling experience. - Dmpstrbaby

A group of students set out to make a documentary about a supposed bear poacher, Hans. The students are following Hans through Western Norway. When they try to interview him he tells them to go away, but they persist. As they follow him into a forest, they see flashing lights and hear roars from something larger than a bear. Hans comes running back to his vehicle, screaming "Troll!". They all seek refuge in his car, as their own is now turned over with the tires eaten. Afterwards, when the students ask if they can join Hans in his hunt and film it, he answers yes.

The next day the student meets up with Hans, who wants to make sure none of them are Christian, since the trolls can detect them by their smell. They assure him that they are not, and they return to the same forest as the night before. Hans points to a small brook and tells them to take off their clothes, wash themselves and slather themselves with troll 'scent' made from "everything you can squeeze out of a troll". After this they follow him deeper into the forest, where they are told to wait for further instructions. As they wait, they begin to think that Hans is playing a trick on them. Suddenly they see a bright flash, hear another roar and feel the ground shake. Out of the woods comes a giant troll with three heads. They flee back into the woods, where they hide as the troll smells after Christian blood. They return to Hans's car, where they see the troll turn to stone. They decide to follow Hans and document his work as he sets out to kill all the trolls that have broken out of their territories, and to find out why they have started to break out now and not earlier. - Wikipedia